Intro
"Pumpkin, put some music on, I feel like dancin'."
"Hold on, suga, I'm fixin' to right now
3,6,4
awright,
now come over here, woman, let's get this shindig started,
woo! C'mon, everybody!
Now what in the hell is wrong
with this juke machine?"
"Be warned, my children
six will visit
followed
by the crumbling of time itself. Before
the coming of Shangra La, a dark Carnival will sweep
across the land, as a shadow,
plagued with destruction.
A parade of freaks, jugglers, and death. This wretched nightmare
is led by six faces.
Three have come
three have gone. The fourth emerges
now. He walks among
us as a shadow, void
of light, powered by your own darkness, strengthened by your own
wickedry. A horrid reflection
of your very own deep desires cast and reflected back upon
yourself. Brothers and Sisters! The time has
come for the Necromaster. The unleashing of
the fourth joker's card. The arrival of
The Great Milenko
Milenko
Milenko
"
"This damn thing! Maryanne, what in the hell
is wrong with this music box?"
"Don't mind that old thing, honey, it does that
all the time."
Great Milenko
(Chorus:)
Great Milenko (Ha Ha-Ha Ha Haaa
)
Great Milenko (Hm-hm-Hm-hm Ha-ha-Ha-ha)
Great Milenko (Ha Ha-Ha Ha Haaa
)
Great Milenko (Hm-hm-Hm-hm Ha-ha-Ha-ha)
(end chorus)
(Chorus)
Come one, come all, and witness magic!
I introduce to you an occult sorcerer of the ancient craft of Necromancy.
A caster of mind-bending illusions, from the nethervoid of the shadow
walkers, excel from Shangra La
The great Milenko.
(Chorus)
(Chorus)
Ladies and Gentlemen, witness the keeper
of arcane, wicked voodoo magic. A beguiler of spells, hexes, and curses,
with the help of potions, talismans, and ancient relics from the forbidden
realms of the dark carnival. Ladies and Gentlemen
The Great
Milenko!
(Chorus w/Milenko echo)
(Chorus w/Milenko echo)
Hokus Pokus
Serial Slaughterin' Strangulars, Jugglin'
Jugulin' Juggulas,
Fall-in, fat floppy titty freaks
IC
fuckin' P's in the Haugh!(Hoo Hoo!)
Abracadabra, boom shaka day, I'm Violent
J, and I'm back like a vertebrae.
And I come with a hat full of tricks,
Trunk full of faygo, car full of fat
chicks.
Ha Ha-Ha Ha Ha Ha-Ha-Ha, fuck you.
Wicked Clowns, we'd like to say what's
up, to the Cobras, X-men, and Counts,
And everybody with clown love, even
sucks I never heard of.
Roll into town, and out with the big
top,
Four cards down, and two more still
to drop.
And when it does, I'd pack up and hit
the road,
Cuz I don't wanna see your head explode!
Toss me an ax, and I'll toss you a dead
chicken,
Add a buck, ya get a two liter wit'
'em.
And when the genie says on with the
show,
it's Hokus Pokus Joker's,
Great Milenko.
(Once again, It's the psychotic carnival
creatures in the ha
)
(chorus:)
Hokus Pokus Joker's ride,
Come take a spin on a carny-ride
(end chorus)
(Southwest slivering snakes of darkness.)(w/Milenko
echo)
(chorus)
Shazaam, Bam! Shaka-laka lokey, Shaggy
the clown back like scoliosis,
Call me a psycho-skitzo-freak, and I'll
call you by your name! (Dick anus)
Cuz I could give two shits and a fuck,
I bounce down Frimmer in a popcorn-clown
truck.
I'm a circus ninja southwest voodoo
wizard, I grab ya gizzard!
Jump on the carpet, let's take a spin,
Everybody's waitin' for the show to
begin.
Up to the top, by the neck, and let
ya go, (Wow!)
Try to land in a glass of faygo! (UH!)
You suck! Ya missed the fuckin' glass,
Broke ya neck, and busted ya fuckin'
ass,
But the genie says on with the show,
Hokus Pokus Jokers, Great Milenko!
(What awaits you after death? Rub the
lamp and explore!)
(chorus)
(Enter Milenko's funhouse! Walk right
through the wretched hall!)(w/Milenko
echo)
(chorus)
F-F-Fuck off!
F-F-Fuck off!
Clown dog
Freak dog
Joker dog
Milenko dog
(Visions of Joker cards flashing in
your mother's face!)
(Female chorus)
Rude boy and Chunky, down wit' the clown,
First time we ever went to Mexican town.
I remember, we couldn't pay the bill,
they got hot,
And beat us down in the fucking parking
lot! (Fuck you!)
Toljest, Jump Steady, and Nate the Mack,
Tagged ICP by the train tracks!
And it was on, the dawn of a new day,
Magical carpets creepin' down the freeway.
(Hoo Hoo)
Walked in a gypsy's tent with a food
stamp,
And walked out with a magical limp,
yeah,
I met Milenko, he gave me three wishes,
That night, I fucked three fat bitches!
Stank, get the fuck wit' it, forget
it,
I'll rip ya face off, and wipe my ass
wit' it!
When the genie says on with the show,
It's Hokus Pokus Jokers, Great Milenko!
(Primal order, magic train, come join
us in song!)
(chorus)
(City to village, hamlet to town, the
show must go on!)(w/Milenko echo)
(chorus)
(Giant ladies, bearded ladies, radiant
ladies! Ladies?)
(female chorus)
(Clouds of darkness, and underneath
them come the clown!)
(chorus)
Fuck that!
Piggy Pie
Ahhh! They get it! Woo! We got some
fresh fills for your fat chicken-ass to
snack on,
bitch!
So here, start wit' a slice of this
fresh piggy pie, mother fuka!
The first little piggy, his house is
made of wood,
He lives in a chicken turkey piggy neighborhood.
He likes to fuck his sister, and drink
his moonshine,
A typical redneck filthy fuckin' swine!
I rode into town with my ax in my holster,
Everybody knows about the wicked piggy
roaster.
A farmer at the border, he tried to
take me out,
I drew my ax with the quickness, and
cut his chicken feathers out!
Walked in the village, and to the piggy's
place,
He opened up his door, and popped me
in the face.
It blew me off the porch, and cracked
my head in half,
But I'm a Juggalo, so it only made me
laugh. (Hehe!)
Forty in hand, I rose from the dead,
And threw with all my might, I made
a pig noise off his head.
Since we out west, I had a little fun,
And pulled his fuckin' tongue out the
back of his cranium!
(Chorus:)
Three little piggies, to make a piggy
pie.
There's nothing like the sound when
you hear a piggy cry.
I might use a gun, (No!)
I might use an ax, (yes!)
The carnival's in town, come and get
your freaky sex!
(end chorus)
The second little piggy, his house is
made of brick,
And this little piggy is a mutha fuckin'
dick.
He sits on his bench and gets all the
respect,
But if I get a chance, I'm goin' straight
for the neck.
He walked in the room, and everybody
rose,
Lopped off bucket chillin' underneath
my clothes.
First they let the piggy, now you can
finally sit,
But what this piggy don't know is he's
about to get his neck wet!
Now I see the baliff, I'm thinkin' what
the fuck?
I can smoke this room before his hearing
aid will pick it up.
Old-ass man, I let him get away,
That tired mutha fucka, probably die
tomorrow anyway.
Here come the piggy, it's time for my
case,
His eyes are blood red with a wicked
lookin' face.
He saw my joker's smile, and sentenced
me a dime,
So I racked on the bucket, made it fuckin'
rain pork rhines!
(chorus)
(chorus)
The last little piggy, his house is
made of gold,
He lives in a mansion on his own private
road,
I started walking down it, the gaurd
he told me wait,
I bounced off his head and did a Jackie
Chan over the gate!
Cuz this little piggy, must definatly
fry,
I'm a lop his nugget off and toss it
in the sky.
And then I watch the moon take the form
of the devil,
And pull it out the sky, and beat it
with a shovel.
People in my city, they fight for they
meals,
He sleeps on a matress stuffed with
hundred dollar bills.
A ritchie is the devil, he never really
made it,
So I'm a take his money stack and stuff
his face wit' it.
Opened up his door, he's sleeping in
his bed,
I grabbed a brick, and roller-laid it
upside his head.
He begged for his life, I told him it's
too late,
It took away his dough and watched the
devil suffocate, cuz I need
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
Rrrrriiinnng.
"Hotline."
"H-Hello?"
"Whuddup."
"What's up. I not sure that I wanna
live any more, that's what's up."
"Hold On!
Helloo?"
"I-I need someone to talk to."
"Call your mom."
"My mother died last year."
"Serves her right, bitch! Hahahaha!
I'm just playin', fuck-nuts. Listen!
Whenever you're
feelin'
low, just page me, and I'll call you."
"You will?"
"Sure. I'll call you a nerdy bitch
for botherin' me! Now! Don't blow your
fuckin' head off."
"Why not? Who cares if I do?"
"The poor guy who's gotta clean
that shit up! If you're gonna do it, do it outside or somethin'!"
"Y-You think I won't really do
it, don't ya?"
"Honestly, I could give a rat's
ass."
"You think I won't, huh? You think
I'm kidding? You think I'm-"
"Do it! Do it Fucker! Bring me
the gun, I'll fuckin' do it for ya!"
BOOM!
"Hello? Hello? Are ya there?"
"Hello?"
"I knew ya wouldn't do it, ya scary
bitch!"
How Many Times
(chorus:)
How many times will I ask myself why,
how many times?
How many times will I ask myself why,
how many times will I cry?
(end chorus)
(chorus)
How many times will you honk your horn
and say fuck you?
Now what the fuck does that do?
Ya feel better now? I didn't let ya
pass,
How 'bout I stop my car, and beat your
fuckin' ass?
How many times will my neighbor beat
his wife?
Somewhere in that house there's a butcher
knife.
Fuckin' drunk, swingin' his fists about,
Why don't you wait till he sleeps, then
take him out?
How many times will I sit in a hot car?
Traffic jam, been sittin' for a fuckin'
hour.
Must be an accident, I hope nobody died,
Finally get there, and the crash is
on the other side!
The gawkers roll by and creep slow,
Hopin' they can see a mangled body show.
Some park, and stand there and watch
it all,
With their kids, they point, and fuckin'
stare! (and just look!)
I remember one time I was pulled over,
Handcuffed, the cop was like, show's
over.
People watching, hoping that he shoots
me,
I just wanted to choke their fucking
heads!
(chorus w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)
How many times will I wait in a line,
It's three-thirty, I fuckin' got here
at nine.
I'm finally up to the front, can't wait
another minute,
Why am I here? To pay a fucking parking
ticket.
The lady at the counter acts like a
fuckin' bitch,
No smiles, no help, you're just a piece
of shit,
I'm gettin' pissed, calm down, fuck
it, forget it,
Back to my car, and there it is, another
ticket!
How many times will a crackhead smoke
crack,
And ask me for some money cuz he wants
crack,
Give him money, again, he's coming back,
Walk away, and here's another, "Gimmie
crack."
How many time will a kid give a dirty
look,
A little punk-ass bitch tryin to be
a crook,
I wrote the book, I was out robbin'
liquor stores,
When you were just a nut stain in your
mama'a drawers.
(chorus w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)
How many times will you steal my car
stereo,
It don't even work, ya feel like a bitch,
don't ya?
I vacuum all the fuckin' glass off from
my seat,
I sit down, and got a piece stuck in
my butt-cheek.
How many times did I walk in, and just
sit,
And have to listen, and learn all this
bullshit,
Learnin' history and science, fuckin'
wait,
Knowin' that, will that put food on
my plate?
Yeah, can I walk into McDonald's, into
the counter,
And tell 'em you can make limestone
from gunpowder,
Will they give me a cheeseburger if
I know that shit?
Fuck no, fuck you, and shut your fuckin'
lip!
How many times will a judge decide my
fate,
Who is he? A bitch! Nothin' great.
He takes shits, and fuck his old floppy
wife,
Plays with his balls and judges my life!
(And who the fuck is he? He judges my
life!)
(chorus w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
"Dawg, I peels caps all day long, mutha fucka.
The call me the big wheeler cap peeler, ya know what I'm sayin'? I run
this whole mutha fucka. The whole block, dawg. They call me the king. The
big king. King killer big wheeler cap peeler, yeah. That's what they call
me around this mutha fucka. I run this bitch. I got this bitch locked down.
I'm a big gang
banga, man. I'm a gang banga mutha fucka. See, they
ain't think that we was gang bangin' out in this neighborhood, but they
don't know about me and my clique, dawg. And if you all wanna be down,
shit, we can sit down and talk, ya know what I'm sayin-"
"BOBBY!!! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW AND
FINISH YOUR HOMEWORK!"
"Uh, here I come! Aw dawg, I gotta go, man.
But look, meet me here tomorrow after school. Oh wait, I got yearbook.
Awright, meet me here around five-thirty tomorrow, dawg. Awright guys,
peace."
"I hope he doesn't get grounded, dude."
"Yeah, me too, 'cause then we couldn't be gang
bangers."
Southwest Voodoo
(vocal ad lib)
Voodoo, runnin' from my magic.
(chorus:)
Ray kay shay, Shooga-booga ba, Southwest
Voodoo's in the haugh!
Wicked voodoo doped up killa!
Magic, dark magic, yo.
(end chorus)
Met this kid named Louie Lou,
He thought he could fuck with this voodoo.
So I turned his head into a lima bean,
And then flicked it off his shoulders
ping!
From Mookan House to Shangra La,
Egyptian Pharohs, kumpa-ta.
Follow me, and join us as we pray,
To the seventeen moons of Kunga Delray.
Walked in the luchroom chantin' spells,
With bamboo bitches and voodoo bells,
Got my own food, who wants some?
I got possum nipples and raccoon tongue.
A non-believer once started to laugh,
So I launched a fireball up his punk-ass!
Then everybody heard him squeal,
"This voodoo shit's for real!"
It just takes:
(pre-chorus:)
A head from a newt, a wing from a bat,
A tongue from a snake, a tail from a
rat,
A neck from a chicken, an eye from a
crow,
And a little itty-bitty itty drip of
faygo!
(end pre-chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
Gripped out fauna on a windy night,
Ya see voodoo scribblins in the moonlight,
Painted all on the city street,
It's the ancient craft of gang-bangin'!
Hey! J! What's in the bag?
A shrunken head, and shrivled scrotum
sac!
Why? Ya think voodoo's fake?
Come to the graveyard, I'll make the
dead wake.
Raise, raise, shooga-boom ba.
Sleep no longer, raise, quick!
Raise, raise, shooga-boom ba,
"Leave us alone, you fuckin' punk
bitch!"
Well, fuck it, I ain't that done yet,
But one day you can bet I'm a freak!
(w/echo)
We'll make the whole world dance with
the dead,
And just like my homey said, it only
takes,
(pre-chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
Voodoo, runnin' from my magic,
Voodoo, runnin' from my magic,
Voodoo, runnin' from my magic,
I'll make a voodoo doll of ya, and fling
ya nuts!
(pre-chorus)
(pre-chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)(w/vocal as lib)
"And now, the flying Fritz brothers
"
"Ooooooo
"
"Ahhhhhh
"
"Ohhhhhh
"
"Uh!Ah!Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!"
Splat.
Halls of Illusions
Ticket please, thanks, walk through
the doors,
Into the Halls of Illusion and visit
yours,
To see what could've, and should've,
and would've been real,
But you had to fuck up the whole deal.
Let's take a walk down the hallway,
It's a long way, it takes all day,
And when we get to the end, ya find
a chair,
With straps and chains, we slap you
in there!
Lock you down tight, so you can't move
a thread,
And, pull your eyelids up over your
head!
Cuz you're about to witness an Illusionary
dream,
It's just too bad it ain't worth seeing.
You walk in and see two kids on the
floor,
They're playin' nintendo, and he's got
the high score,
And sittin behind them, chillin' in
the chair,
Is your wife, and you look, oh, you
ain't there!
It's some other man, and they're hand
in hand,
How she looks so happy, ya don't understand,
See, this isn't a notion, it never came
true
All because of you!
Back to reality and what you're about,
Your wife can't smile, cuz you knocked
her teeth out!
And she can't see straight from gettin'
hit,
Cuz you're a fat fuckin' drunk piece
of shit!
But it's all good, here, come have a
beer,
I'll break the top off and, and shove
it in your ear!
And your death comes wicked, painful,
and slow
At the hands of Milenko!
(chorus:)
Great Milenko, wave your wand!
(Don't look now, your life is gone)
This is all because of you!
(What you got yourself into)
(end chorus)
(chorus)
Look who's next, it's Mr. Clark,
The dirty old man from the trailer park.
Ya got your ticket? Thanks, take your
coat off,
And later on, why not? I'll rip your
throat off.
Let's take a walk down the hallway,
It's a long way, it takes all day,
And when ya get to the end, ya find
a chair,
Ya see all the blood? Yeah, ya boy was
just here!
We get all different kind of people
comin' through,
Richies, chickens, and bitches just
like you!
In the halls, everybody gets a turn,
To sit and witness your illusion before
ya burn!
What do we have here? Oh dear!
No way! It looks like ya kids' in the
O.K.!
Ya daughter's chillin' up in college,
top grades,
And your son's a fuckin' doctor, fat
pay!
They got family, the kids, and it's
all good!
They even coach little league in the
neighborhood!
Is this true? Have ya really seen the
holy ghost?
Naw, bitch! Not even close!
Back to reality, your son's on crack!
And your daughter's got nut stains on
her back!
And they both fuckin' smell like shit,
And live in the gutter,
And sell crack to each other.
When they were kids, you'd beat 'em
and leave 'em home!
And even whip 'em with the cord of the
telephone!
And that reminds me man, hey you got
a call!
Watch your step to hell, in the hallway.
(chorus)
(chorus)
It's time to pack up and move to the
next town.
But we forgot Mr. Bigot,
Okay, dig it,
We can't show ya an illusion, cuz we're
all packed, bye!
I'll still cut your neck out! How's
that?
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)
Under the Moon
I'm still here..under the moon.
I was just a child but you seemed
like so much more.
The way you would approach me and drift
across the floor,
I'd see you in the hall and you'd kiss
me with a smile.
I never understood it was I even worth
your while?
The other kids at school they would
hate me and they'd spit.
Cuz I was just a no one to them I wasn't
shit.
But you would always hold me and stand
there by my side,
We were only 17 we'd be together till
we died.
But then it all happened the ever dreadful
day.
Somebody tried to rape you and now I'll
make him pay.
You pointed him out to me- my thoughts
began to race.
I took my daddy's 45 and shot him in
the fuckin' face!
I did it all for you and though I'm
facin' years
I would do the time just to equal all
your tears
The last thing that you told me when
I left the courtroom
Is that we'd always be together... cuz
we're both under the moon.
"I'll forever love you even
in your doom, we'll always be together cuz we're both under the moon"
I sit here in my cell and the walls
are made of stone
I justified your pain but now I sit
alone
I write another letter I write one everyday
I never got a letter back I write em
anyway
I try to call collect- your number has
been changed
I'm starin at the light bulb and I start
to feel deranged
You never came to visit me I sit facin
tha glass
No-one's on tha other side and now its
in tha past
My head is always spinnin I'm poundin'
on the wall
I feel like I'm forgotten no sign of
you at all
You're probably gettin' married you're
probably gettin fucked
I'll break out of this cage and try
to cut that muthafucka up
I curl up in the corner my body will
corrode,
My teeth are turning into dust skin
is growing mold
I'm starin' out tha window of my eternal
doom
I know that you are out there... somewhere
underneath the moon.
"i'll forever love you even
in your doom we'll always be together cuz we're both under the moon"
Many many years many more to go duz she still
remember? God he only knows I now become a savage they chain me to a wall
I still can see your body I still can hear ya call I'm nothin but a maggot
I'm locked away and lost the world that duzn't
want me my dignity is tossed and to tha girl for
who I feel this doom look here...fxck you and the moon!
What is a Juggalo?
(vocal ad lib)
What is a juggalo?
Lemme think for a second. (well?)
Oh, he gets butt naked.
And then he walks through the street
winkin' at freaks,
Wit a two-liter stuck in his butt-cheeks!
What is a juggalo?
He just don't care.
He might try to put a weave in his nut
hair.
Cuz he could give a fuck less what a
bitch thinks,
He tell her that her butt stinks, and
all that,
What is a juggalo?
He drinks like a fish,
And then he starts huggin' people like
a drunk bitch,
Next thing he's pickin' fights with
his best friends,
Then he starts with the huggin' again,
fuck,
What is a juggalo?
A fuckin' lunatic.
Somebody with a rope tied to his dick,
Then he jumps out a ten-story window
oh!
(chorus:)
What is a juggalo?
A juggalo? If that's what it is, well
fuck if I know.
What is a juggalo?
I don't know, but I'm down with the
clown, and I'm down for life, yo.
(end chorus)
(chorus)
(vocal breakdown)
What is a juggalo?
A dead body.
Well he ain't really dead, but he ain't
like anybody
That you've ever met before.
He'll eat Monopoly and shit out Connect
Four.
What is a jug-
What the fuck? Connec-man, that shit's
wack.
Don't worry 'bout my shit, just rap,
mutha fucker.
What is a juggalo?
He ain't a bitch boy.
He'll walk through to the hills and
beat down a rich boy.
Walks right in the house where ya havin'
supper,
And dip his nuts in ya soup
bloop!
What is a juggalo?
Well he ain't a phoney.
He'll walk up and bust a nut in your
macaroni.
And watch you sit there and finish up
the last bit,
Cuz you're a stupid-ass dumb fuckin'
idiot.
What is a juggalo?
He's a graduate.
He graduated from
well,
At least he's got a job, he's not a
dumb putz,
He works for himself scratchin' his
nuts, Ha!
What is a juggalo?
A hulkamaniac.
He powerbombs mutha fuckas into thumbtacks.
(Bwa!)
People like him till they find out he's
unstable.
He sabooed ya mama through a coffee
table. (Oh my god!)
(chorus)
(vocal breakdown)
(chorus)
(chorus)
(vocal breakdown)
What is a juggalo?
House of Horrors
"Hey there, do ya like excitement?"
"Yeah."
"Do ya like suspense?"
"Uh-huh."
"Do you like Nel Carter?"
"Tst-no."
"Good, cuz you won't find her here,
this is the house of horrors. And for you it's absolutely free, step right
in."
"Thanks."
"Say no more stupid-ass, your flesh
says enough."
Hello?
It's so dark.
Don't lose me.
C'mon, I found a door
Wabugawoo, Waaa! Welcome to the house
of horrors,
Ya born in a barn, shut the fuckin'
door.
Ya see, bam, cuz I'm about to scare
ya
Bbbblblblblbl, okay now I dare ya
Close ya eyes, open up ya mouth, and
count to ten,
Don't wanna, huh? Cuz ya know my nuts
are goin' in,
I'm twisted, I'll cut ya finger off,
and stick it in ya butt
Ooouuuuhhhhh
and glue it shut.
This is when I get get crazy, lemme
show ya somethin',
Bbbbbbb! Ya know what that means? It
don't mean nothin', ha-ha!
But it scared ya, cuz people don't be
doin' that shit,
But me, bbbbbbbb, bitch, bbbbb, now
what about it? (Bbbbbbbbb)
Guess what, I'm a serial killer, it's
a bad habit,
I killed Tony, Lucky Charms, and the
silly rabbit,
Uh! Cut the lights off, see that shit,
I'm glowin'
Allright, I'm done, cut 'em back on,
wait, where ya goin'?
Welcome to the House of Horrors!
(Chorus:)
Comes from within me, me, me.
Comes from within me, horrors, hey.
Comes from within me, me, me.
Come to the House of Horrors, hey.
(end chorus)
(chorus)
Honey, I'm not haning a good time.
I know, C'mon, This must be the way
out.
Hey, what the fuck, come in guys, grab
a chair,
Don't mind me drinkin' my beer in my
underwear.
C'mon, let's play some cardback, I just
gotta cary,
"Hey, keep it down in there, Shaggs,
what the hell?" Sorry!
Look at that shit!(what?) You almost
got me grounded,
I'm a have to take your forehead and
pound it.
I'll bend you over, and tie you up to
a pole,
And strech your nuts back, and fling
'em up your butthole!
I'm a phantom, listen to me, ahhh,
That didn't do it? How 'bout this? Ahhhh!!!
I'm so scary, they call me Joey Terrifyin',
Did ya know that? (yeah) No ya didn't,
I was lyin'!
I represent Igors,
I'm yellin' in town,
I'm comin' outta southwest,
Wicked Clowns!
Bathrooms? Yeah, it's right there, down
the hall,
Don't flush it though, I'll make dinner
for you all,
Amuck, naya, baaa, but that's two,
Wait a minute, hey, don't leave me yet,
hey!
Welcome to the House of Horrors!
(chorus)
(chorus)
Honey?
What?
I'm s-scared.
I know, sweetie, come on!
(vocal interlude w/laughs)
Jump Steady, Nate the Mack, lemme tell
ya somethin',
Wit Billy Bill and Rude Boy, (what about
'em?) Nothin'!
They're my boys, I just had to give
'em props,
And together we form the cyclops!
He-he-he-he-he look at you, he-he, you're
a bitch.
Should I let you're ass go? Ha-ha-ha-ha,
no.
I'll let your bitch out, but you get
the bone,
Run along sugar-tits, he ain't comin
home.
"Dont let the door hit you where
the good lord split ya
bitch."
Neden Game
VOICE OF HOST: LETS MEET CONTESTANT NUMBER ONE hes a skitzophranic serial
killa klown who says women love his sexy smile lets see if his charm will
work on Sharon Sharon, whats your question for Number 1? Sharon: Number
1, i belive first impressions last forever if u were to eat dinner with
me and my family, how would you make it last forever? hmm well lets see
id have to think about it i might show up in a tux HA! but i doubt it id
probably just show up naked like i always do and lick your mama in the
eye and tell her FUCK YOU! hurry up bitch im hungry i smell spaghetti,
i pinch her loopy ass and tell her get the food ready your dad would probably
start trippin, and get me pissed, id have to walk up and bust him in the
fuckin lips! its dinnertime! were hearin grace from your mother i pull
a forty out and pour some for your little brother im steady starin at your
sister, ill tell ya this, ya know for only 13 SHE GOT SOME BIG TITS! after
that, your dad would try to jump again, but only this time id put the 40
to his chin after your mom dies the dishes and the silverware, id dry fuck
her till i nut in my underwear
~~~applause~~~
HOST: now lets meet contestant number 2 hes a psychopathic deranged
crack head freak who works for the dark carnival he says women call him
stretch nutz Sharon, lets hear your question...
SHARON: i like a man whos not afraid to show his true emotion a mna
who expresses himself in his own special way number 2, if u were to fall
in love with me, how would you show me that you care?
first thing, i could never love you, you sound like a witchy bitch yo
FUCK YOU!! but if i did, id probably show you that i care by takin all
these mutha fuckas outta here id go through your phone book, and whack
em all, then find contestant number one and break his fuckin jaw WHAT!!??
anyone that looked at you would have to pay, id be blowin fuckin nuggets
off all day id grab your titties, and stretch em down past your waist,
let em go and watch em both spring up in your face id sing love songs to
ya the best i can get ya naked and hit it like a CAVE MAN!! we go to tha
beach and walk through the sand i throw a little in your face and say im
just playin as you spit it all out, i rub your back, and grab your underwear
and WEDGE IT UP YOUR ASS CRACK!!
~~~laughter and applause~~~
HOST: well it sounds like contestant number 2 is just overflowing with
sensitivity, Sharon its a tough choice so far, sharon lets have your last
question to find out whos gonna have the rights to your neden
SHARON: ok, if we were at a dance club, and you both noticed me at the
same time, tell me, how would you each get my attention and what would
your pick up line be who ever'sthe smoothest wins!!
first, id slide up the bar, and tell ya that i cant believe how fuckin
fat you are id say i like the way you make your titties shake, and if you
lost a little weight you'd look like Ricki Lake
FUCK THAT!! youd be jackin me quick, id order you a drink , and stir
it with my dick, and then to get your attention in a crowded place, id
simply walk up and stick my nutz in your face
yeah freak her with yo nutz that'll get her
TELL HER THAT SHES FAT, YEAH THAT'LL WORK EVEN BETTER
look, fuck you, i got a strong rap shit you dont want contestant number
two hes mad whack i walked in a barn, and there he was, standin up on a
bucket Hooough tryin to fuck it it was big fuckin smelley ass farm llama
DAMN DAWG!! how ya gonna diss your mama??
~~~champagne popping and laughing~~~
Hallalujah
"Give God the first portion of
your income, say that with me."
"Give God the first portion of
your income."
"Give it first! Not after the deducts.
Not after the social security, and the hospitalization, and the malnutrition.
Not after all these things on ya check, ya say 'I'm a give God a little
what's left.' You do, and that's what you gonna get from God."
Who am I? I'm not the Devil,
I can take you to my level,
Above the rocks, above the earth,
Tell me what your soul is worth.
How much money do you make?
How much will you let me take?
I will give you tranquility,
Just send you wealth and checks to me.
Life is going to expire,
And your soul will burn in fire.
You will perish in the thunder,
Unless you call my hotline number.
God has asked you to make me rich,
Me and my fat-rat gaudy bitch.
On your T.V.'s late at night,
Send those checks, and I'll guide you
to the light.
"Don't put away your wallets just
yet, brothers and sisters. There's somebody here I'd like all of you to
meet. This is little Jonathan. Jonathan, say hello to the lovely
people."
"Hello."
"Jonathan has problems. Twisted
neck, tangled legs, crooked spine, but we can heal this boy!
For just, uh, six thousand dollars,
we can heal this boy!"
God called me and then stopped by,
And he told me you're gonna die,
Unless you buy my holy water,
Check, cash, or a money order.
This is true, don't question me,
I'll even send you shit for free.
It's only ten buck for the call,
And I'll send a prayer, no charge at
all.
Put your lips up to the screen,
Close your eyelids, and intervene,
Your lips to mine, now send the cash,
And while you're there, you can kiss
my ass.
Take your paycheck, and send me half,
And I'll send you God's autograph.
I'll get you Allah's, and Bhuddah's
too,
Even Zeus, I dont give a fuck who,
Just send me that money.
"Would you like to be healed, little
Jonathan?"
"Yeah, Reverend."
"You see, brothers and sisters,
this-"
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
"Excuse me. I told you never to
page me on a sermon day. Yes? Uh-huh.
Hallelujah.
Howdy.
People, that was the lord, today only,
he will heal this boy, for just five
thousand dollars!"
Pass the collection plate
Pass the collection plate
Pass the collection plate
Pass the collection plate
(Show me how you give, I'll tell you
how to live.)
Your total's twenty-two eleven,
For your set of keys to heaven.
Make the checks out in my name,
Me or God it's all the same.
Bring your crippled ass to me,
Pay my usher the holy fee.
I'll bless your legs, and bless your
chair,
Then wheel your bitch ass outta here.
Now a special ceremony,
This part don't cost any money.
Drip a drop of blessed water,
Now I fertalize your daughter.
Even though I fucked a hooker,
Took your baby girl and shook her,
You still buy everything I sell,
And I'm livin' well
See you in hell.
"Four-thousand eight-hundred, nine-hundred,
five thousan-Hallelujah!
You did it, brothers and sisters! Are
you ready, Jonathan? Lord almighty, we've met your price, give me the healing
power, I can feel it! Lord! Rumilumilamanamanumi! This boy is healed!"
"Huh?"
"Now, to the naked eye, it would
appear that this boy has not been healed, but I can assure you, this boy's
spirit has been healed! Inside this tangled, mangled frame is a healed
little boy.
His spirit is healed! Hallelujah!"
"Country Cookin', can I take
your order?"
"You want the red-eye gravy with
that?"
"With chitlins or black-eyed peas?"
"Lemme cypher up your bill, here."
"That comes to fourteen nintey-five."
"Okay, be ready quicker that two
jiggles of a jackrabbit's ass."
Down With The Clown
"This one goes out to the ninjas that's been down since Carnival of
Carnage. Naw, fuck that. Since Dog Beats. Naw fuck that, since Basement
Cuts, mutha fucka!"
How long will the juggalos be down wit' me?
How long till they forget me? Check it out,
What if I grew another fuckin' head?
And his name was Violent
Ed?
And he headbutt me every time I cussed?
I would need two microphones when I bust.
Would you show me love, even with another head?
Or would you be like, "Fuck you and Ed!"
Or, what if I sold out like a bitch?
And took the makeup off and went soft?
Call myself Detroit southwest lover?
And put my ugly-ass face on the album cover?
Went R&B top ten hit,
And we had Jodecie singin' all over our shit?
Fuck that though, yo, I'm a juggalo,
So don't forget me like ya did with Minuto.
(chorus:)
What about when the world's like fuckas, killas?
What will ya be? - Down
What about when I'm a hundred and three?
What will ya be? - Down, down
What about when the world's like fuckas, killas?
What will ya be? - Down
What about when the carnival comes to ya town?
I'm a be down wit the clown!
(end chorus)
How long will ya be down with a ghetto puppet?
I say I'm sick in the nugget, and ya love it!
I ate a dead body, I ain't proud of it,
I told you all about it, and you all applaud it! (yay!)
I got problems, I'm haunted by a carnival,
I could run and tell a doctor, but what for?
I just put it on tape wit' a phat beat,
And make a quick buck, I'm like, fuck! (hoo hoo)
I could've came out sportin' some hammer pants,
Kick steppin' with Shaggs, and try to dance,
Make ya mom happy, keepin' it soft,
I'd rather grab my dick and tell your mom to fuck off!
I know then you'd probably start to trip,
And swing at me, but hit Violent Ed in the lip,
Look, I don't even know what I'm tryin' ta say,
Just don't forget me like ya did with Rahbay.
(chorus)
(chorus 2:)
I'm a be down, I'm a be down,
Down with the clown till I'm dead in the ground.
(end chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 2)
Rrrriiinnnggg.
"Hello?"
"Somebody page me?"
"Hi
"
"Who the fuck is this?!"
"It-it's me, you said I could page you-"
"No, no. You misunderstood me. I said fuck you! Nobody cares if you're
dead or alive, so go fuck yourself!"
Click.
"Okay, call me later."
Just Like That
Jump outta bed, and I head for the grapenuts,
Eat 'em quick, or they soggy, and that sucks,
Try to find a clean pair of socks, and a shirt,
Still sport the same drawers, even though they hurt.
In the fridge there's a faygo, it tastes ill,
Cuz it's fatter that a bitch on a big wheel!
I got a few moneybacks, and a little change,
So I'm headed to the store, when the phone rings:
"What up, man check it out, I know this bitch,
She gots another friend with her, and her dad's rich,
If we find us a ride up to Rynethat,
Garunteed, we can fuck 'em both on the spot!"
Oh shit, lemme call Bill-Bill,
I wanna go and let my nuts do the windmill,
He ain't home, fuck, I'll call Mike Clark,
Cuz I know he can get the fuckin' Skylark,
He said he can, but he's broke, and it needs gas,
But I wanna buy this faygo - think fast!
I know my brother Jump Steady's got a few bones,
But that's goin' through his shit when he ain't home!
"Nevermind, J, Legs loned me a ten,
No need to get punched in ya head again,
Tell Mike to scoop me up right away,
And then faygos and nuttin' hoes all day!"
Fuck yeah, throw my pro wings on my feet,
Lock the house, and wait for 'em in the street,
I wish I had a piece of gum, or somethin', fuck,
My mouth still kinda tastes like grape nuts.
Here they come, nope, it wasn't them,
Seems like the same cars drivin' by again,
It pulls up
"Hey, man, you're in luck
"
"W-what'd you say, man?"
BOOM.
fuck.
Pass Me By
"Does this excite you? Think about it! Does it not stagger the imagination?
No builder on earth can concieve any structure to compare to the mansions
above. Won't that be something when you go to live in your own mansion?
There'll be no concern about paying for it, it's already taken care of.
There'll be no worry about veing moved out of it. It will be yours forever."
I got shot, Baa! The murder was heinous.
The bullet went in my eyeball and out my anus.
And I was hit, that was it, on the spot,
Flash, I woke up in a parking lot.
And I'm sittin in a '64 Rinekeys,
With Shaggy Dope written on the car keys.
I look around I can't believe that it's possible,
I'm dead, and I made it to the carnival.
I walk in, it's everything I dreamed of,
Everybody and they mama got clownlove.
Japanese, Lebenese, and Chinese,
Portuguese, and southwest ghetto cheese. (hoo hoo)
Hangin' out with redneck truck drivers,
Instead of always givin' each other piledrivers.
I see my old homey, he died in a drag,
Chillin with two bitches, "What up, Shag?"
And he passed me a blunt like a tree trunk,
I tried to hit it, but couldn't even fuck with it.
And to think, I always been afraid to die,
But I ain't never goin back, to wonder why.
(Chorus:)
We all gonna die. But I'm not gonna fry.
Even though most never try, I'm not gonna let this pass me by, no.
(end chorus)
(chorus)
I was born. First they threw me in a shitpile.
I dealt with it, and lived there for a while.
I got dissed on, pissed on, and beat down,
Mutilated, and tossed out a dead clown.
Next thing ya know, I'm chillin' at the big top,
Free money, and mad bitched non-stop.
No water, it's faygo on tap,
I wash my hair, and my face, and my butt-crack wit' it,
Cuz I can, cuz I'm fat paid,
I got a five story funhouse with a maid,
And she walks 'round wit' her titties hangin' out,
And when I cough, she come and dust my balls off. (hoo hoo)
I'm headed up to the show, I'm gonna see,
Jimi Hendrix, Selena, and Easy E,
Elvis tried to open up but got dissed off,
We got pissed off, because he sounded like butt,
There's no fights, it's a perfect match,
Hillbillies in the crowd tryin' ta cabbage patch,
And ta think, I've always been afraid to die,
But I ain't never goin back, to wonder why
(chorus)
(chorus)
(intro bit)
Did ya ever burn your finger on somethin', hey,
Well picture this, ya nuts burnin' that way.
And a roman candle stickin' in ya butthole,
That's where the greedy stank mutha fuckas go.
This is all hell now, we livin' in it,
But this bullshit'll be over in a minute,
Then it's off to the faygos and in hoes,
New clothes, and patent leather for your toes. (hoo hoo)
And while ya sit around cryin' for ya dead friend,
He's chillin' up there, hey, gettin' mad ends.
He's probably there tryin' ta figure out why you're sad,
He's on the beach gettin' fat, you got it bad.
And for those who ain't down for the next man,
Who rob from the poor, and snatch all ya can,
And any chicken talkin' shit, lemme tell ya somthin',
Hold a lighter to your balls, and you'll see what's comin'.
(chorus)
(chorus)
(intro bit)
(chorus)
(chorus)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(break)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus)(w/vocal ad lib)
(chorus out)
